Sign Language for the 18 Month Old

A couple of days ago, I decided I'd had enough of listening to the 1 yo scream.  He screams when he wants something, he screams when he doesn't want something, he screams when he has nothing better to do than scream.  In a house of 7 voices, screaming cannot be tolerated (OK, it shouldn't be tolerated in a house of 2 voices, but it is especially overwhelming and irritating in a household where the majority of people residing there are under 5 ft tall and haven't hit puberty yet.)

Several weeks back, I had borrowed a baby sign language book from a friend as I pondered the thought that maybe, just maybe, my non-talking 1 yo could learn to sign. In the midst of this fleeting thought, I had a baby and put the whole thing on the back burner. It only took 2.5 weeks of him screaming for every reason under the sun, to bring me back to that original thought. So, I reviewed the few signs I thought would benefit us the most: please, thank you, drink, eat, more, & pacifier.

It wasn't long before the little guy was screaming, and I was able to try out my new experiment.  I stood in front of him, knowing perfectly well that he wanted a drink, and I signed and said with fervor "drink, please."  Well, it is very hard for anyone, let alone a 1 yo, to learn anything when their eyes are closed and they are screaming their heads off.  I imagine I felt much the way Anne Sullivan felt trying to teach Helen Keller.  I did manage to catch him between breaths and connect with his tear-puddled eyes long enough to quickly sign, "drink, please" again before handing him the sippy cup.  We continued this all day yesterday, and I do believe by the end of the day, he was screaming less.  He wasn't signing, but he was looking at me with what could either be described as interest or amusement--I'm not sure which.

Today went even better.  He paid attention to me as I signed, and I think I heard him actually trying to verbalize something other than the word, "UH."  You see, not only is he screaming for what he wants, he also cannot verbalize ANY word.  He has never said "mama" or "dada" or anything other than "UH."  Today, I am sure I heard him several times put the letter "m" in front of "UH."  A HUGE step for him!

I was not expecting this little adventure to help him speak, but I do wonder if the fact that I am getting down on his level and repeatedly verbalizing as I sign, has actually helped to push him along in his verbal skills.  I have always talked a lot to my children from the time they were little bitty, and they have always spoken quite proficiently by the time they were 15 months.  However, I was so overwhelmed when I brought this little guy home, that I think I spent much of his first year just surviving and not speaking directly to him.  I know I have not read to him nearly as much as I did with the others.  Lest you think I am some heartless mother, I do speak to him, but it is often in passing as I am getting him something or getting someone else something.  It is not the eye to eye conversations that I remember having with my first born (who by the way, spoke in full sentences at the age of 13 mons and has not stopped speaking since!)

So, we shall sally forth into this unknown territory.  He'll either learn to sign or learn to talk (I am not EVEN going to entertain the thought that he might just continue to scream).  No matter the outcome, I have learned a valuable lesson...I MUST NOT forget to speak into my children's eyes.  I MUST NEVER be too busy to look directly at them, get on their level, and say more to them than, "here's your drink" or "let's change your diaper."  I MUST ALWAYS be the kind of mother who loves them with my words.

Our Little Firecracker is Here!

Well, looks like July 4 was the day!

Baby joined our little family at 3:28 pm weighing 10 lbs 2 oz and measuring 21.5" She had a ton of brown hair gracing her head, long, skinny toes, feet, and fingers, and chubby little cheeks. Her name means "hard-working" & "wise."

Now for the story...

I had gone to my doctor's appointment on the 3rd and baby was head down, I was dilated to between a 2-3, and 50% effaced. It was just a matter of time.

Sure enough, starting at about 2:30 am on the 4th the contractions started coming every 3 minutes apart and hard. I let them go for about 1.5 hrs until I felt I couldn't take it much longer and I woke my husband. He raced around while I laid in the bed. My sides were hurting something awful--in fact, to the point, I couldn't get out of bed by myself. Ty helped me out of bed and to the car and they continued every 3 minutes apart all the way to the hospital. But, I had this funny feeling that something wasn't quite right. I didn't feel like I was dilating, yet I hoped to be pleasantly surprised.

They got me to my room and I changed into my own gown (I hate hospital gowns!) and a nurse checked me. I knew right away something was up. I was still only a 2-3, 50% effaced and she couldn't even feel baby or my cervix! Another nurse came in and tried harder (ouch!), but still couldn't tell where baby was. Finally, my doctor came in, checked me and called for the sono machine. The sonogram showed a very active, transverse breech baby (thus the reason my sides hurt so bad, thus the reason I wasn't dilating).

My doctor then gave me 2 options...c-section or try to turn her (this carried a ton of risks considering I was in full-fledged labor and was a VBAC--she said we had about a 50% chance of it being successful). I sat there and bawled. I had worked so hard to avoid c-sections all these years. When I asked her what another c-section would do to my ability to have more VBACs, she said it causes the risk factor to go way up and we would have to really discuss it long and hard before she would brave those waters. (She is one of the few, if not the only doctor at this hospital who will do a VBAC--we have been so blessed to be able to birth so many children with her)

Dr. called for some meds to slow my contractions for about 15 mins to give Ty and I time to discuss. Thankfully, I have a very level-headed husband who has the gift of discernment even when the pressure is on. He asked to hear more about the external version (turning). She said because I was in full-fledged labor and I birth rather large babies and I am a VBAC, she would want it done with a full epidural and in the OR and with me prepped for a c-section. So, this is what we chose to do.

After the epidural was in place and as they were watching baby's vitals, the doctor stood up against my belly at the baby's feet as sort of a coaxing prep to what was going to happen next. Ty ran out and asked the family that was there to start praying and then he came in and asked if we could pray in the OR. Shortly after he finished praying, the doctor thought my belly had changed shape, so she called for the sono machine and guess what??!! BABY TURNED!!! It all happened so fast, she had to have been turning AS we were praying! Everyone was in shock and couldn't help but acknowledge that something greater than ourselves was at work!

Doctor broke my water to keep baby in position and we watched and waited in the OR another 30 minutes and then back to the birthing suite where I had to decide if I wanted the epidural on or off. Well, epidurals (and most any medications for that matter) make me incredibly sleepy. I could barely keep my eyes open. I knew I could never cope with the pain if I wasn't at the top of my game and out of the bed. I chose to keep the epidural in place and then proceeded to sleep through the ENTIRE labor.

At one point, my labor stalled and they asked about administering small doses of pitocin--to which I agreed. (there was really no way around it at this point). Shortly after that, they woke me up to tell me I was complete and it was time to push.

This is the first time I've not been able to tell when to push and not been able to feel where I was pushing. I literally felt nothing of the 6 contractions and pushes, nor of her crowning. Doctor called for Ty to come catch and there little Emily was, covered in vernix, screaming her chubby little head off. Ty gave her to me and a bit later clamped the cord and cut it (he had never clamped the cord b/f, so he was thrilled!)

Once again, the placenta did not cooperate. The cord detached and the rest simply wouldn't come. It was starting to deteriorate and doctor had to actually reach up inside me and retrieve it. She said if for no other reason, the epidural was well worth it because of that one issue. I never felt a thing.

Despite the fact that I went into this birth desiring the unmedicated, un-interventive birth I had last time and wound up with one of the MOST medicated births I've ever had, I am still praising God that I did not have to have the c-section and that everything worked out the way it did--plus the fantastic testimony to God's power shared with all those nurses and doctors.

I am having one of the easiest recoveries ever and our beautiful little daughter is here--born on the 4th of July just as her daddy had hoped!